Losing Control
by Tiffany Amante
Summary: After Edward warns Jacob to NEVER hurt Bella in anyway again, Bella decides it is still safe to go back to La Push. Bella knows that Jacob is touchy with the subject of vampires, mostly because she is turning into one. Will Jacob expect it to be so soon?
1. Chapter 1: Unexpected

**Chapter 1:**

The thought of seeing Jacob's smile always reminded me of the days when he wasn't so bitter and angry. He was the happy Jacob that helped me forget about my sadness, he was my Jacob.

As Edward and I were driving to the border line, he seemed totally at ease. For awhile, he had forgotten about the "mortal enemy" idea for my sake. He was trying to make me happy, as usual.

"Thank you for doing this again, Edward," I said as he wrapped his arm around my waist and pulled me closer to him. He smiled his angel's smile, which of course, took my breath away.

"Your wish my command, love. Except for a few demands on my part I might add," he whispered. His grin became wider showing his blindingly white teeth.

"Ugh! Can we please not talk about this now, Edward?" I almost shouted.

Marriage.

"Your wish my command," he repeated in a low voice. His eyes were wide with excitement. I couldn't help but to be excited with him, I smiled.

Suddenly Edward's eyes narrowed and his flawless lips turned into a hard line. Could he feel the tension inside of the small car like I felt? I could hear a low growl deep in Edward's chest. Automatically I looked from Edward's intense glare, over to a scowling Jacob Black leaning against The Rabbit with his massive arms crossed against his chest. I couldn't help but to feel a sinking feeling, I sighed.

Edward heard that. He pulled me closer and put his lips to my ear, "Call me." He smiled, but the worries in his eyes were pronounced.

Jacob was getting impatient, he was tapping his toe rapidly and his eyes rolled as he saw Edward get out of the car to say goodbye. Edward leaned down to kiss me.

"Be safe, love," he whispered against my lips. He pulled away abruptly and glowered at Jacob.

"He is screaming that this is wrong. Literally screaming. It's very rude." He smiled halfheartedly. "But I'm sure he'll be very polite when he starts talking with you. Who wouldn't be?" His face was suddenly pained. "He kisses you…hurts you again…" Edward trailed off. I put my hand on his face, reassuring him with my eyes that it would never happen again. I hugged him tightly and started walking toward the "wolf side" of the territory. Looking at Jacob's smile made me smile.

"Hey, Jake!" I called.

"Hi, Bells!" he called back. I was so happy to see him smiling.

I walked to him and he ran the rest of the five feet that were between us. He picked me up and squeezed me tightly. My breath whooshed from my lungs.

"Jake! I can't…BREATHE!" I gasped for air. He let me loose and set me on my feet. We walked to the car in silence because I still hadn't retrieved my breath. He snickered along side me muttering, "Need to toughen up" and "Weakling". I glowered at him teasingly. We climbed into the Rabbit and drove off.

"What do you want to do? Billy wants to see you. Or do you want to go to the beach? Anything, your pick." Although he sounded excited, his eyes were tired. There were bags under them that were stained a deep purple. His eyelids were drooping.

"Jake, you're tired. Maybe you should sleep for an hour or two. We can do something after. I can wait if—

"No! No, Bella. It is okay. I promise." He smiled at me but, I was not convinced.

After minutes of deciding what to do for the day we decided to walk along the beach…again. We talked for what seemed like minutes but were probably hours.

"So," Jacob's face turned pained and sad. "When are you going to…?"

I knew what he was getting at. My face turned sad for his benefit, but my brain was squealing with joy knowing that is was only a matter of time before I was actually in Edward's vampire family. He and I would be lifetime partners, as if we already weren't. But Jacob didn't need to know how excited I was.

"After graduation. In about 2 weeks, Jake." I smiled kindly, but it disappeared when Jacob's hands trembled and his chest started to bulge. He was fighting it, I could tell but this time it didn't seem to be working. I was not expecting him to stay human at that moment but, surprisingly he did.

"Jacob, I'm….sorry...I don't…" I was so fearful of him. His eyes weren't turning back to normal, they were just getting angrier, and all the tiredness that I saw before was completely gone. I suddenly realized something.

Jacob could not control himself. All of Edward's warnings and precautions were because of my safety. If I hadn't convinced Edward that it was untrue this wouldn't have happened.

For the first time, I feared for my life around Jacob Black.

For the first time, I saw him for the monster he really was.


	2. Chapter 2: Protected

Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

"Jacob! Calm down!" I said almost shouting. For once I wish I could here Edward's voice in my head telling me what to do. I begged for it, but his advice would not approach. What was I going to do?

His teeth were in a snarl and he crouched ready to leap. I covered my head with my shaking hands waiting for my life to end that instant. Jacob emitted a final growl and something hard and scorching ran into my body. Everything went black, I finally heard Edward's voice, but it was what he said this morning.

"Be safe, love," Edward repeated in my head. "Be safe, love."

I awoke with a light dewy sweat on my forehead; I was in a familiar white room that was very bright. It hurt my eyes as I squinted to remember what had happened. What was I doing here? I looked around and winced as I remembered that I was previously in La Push.

"Edward?" I knew he was in this room. Where else would he be?

I finally saw him in the back of the hospital room. His eyes were furious with hate for Jacob. It was quite obvious. He crossed the room and sat by my bed with his face only a few inches from mine.

"Edward, I am so sorry. I should have listened to you. I'm sorry. He wasn't…" I trailed off watching his face.

"Bella, it's okay. None of this was your fault. It was mine," Of course he was blaming himself. "Love, I shouldn't have let you go in the first place. Something was bound to happen. I should be the one saying sorry." His face was pained, eyes full of regret that he let me go.

Suddenly the hatred was back. A growl rumbled in his chest.

"I warned him. I warned that _dog_ that if he hurt you, he would pay the consequences. His fault or not," he snarled and a string of profanities flew out of his perfect lips.

"Edward! No! You can't hurt him. Remember the treaty? Please Edward. Think of Billy. Think of the danger it would cause your family, Edward," I begged. I didn't like what Jacob did either but I didn't want to hurt anyone that didn't need to be hurt.

"Bella, he could have _killed_ you. I can't stand the thought of you being killed, especially by that _mongrel_!" He flinched at the thought.

"How bad am I?" I asked warily.

"You broke a few ribs and your arm."

I heard a voice in the hallway. Though, I didn't want to here this voice more than Edward did. Edward tensed and prepared to protect me. Jacob came into the room with caution. His face was sad and wary of what he had done to me. Edward growled wrathfully at him as he leaned closer to me. Jacob was talking to him in his mind.

"No," Edward snarled. I knew what he was asking. He was wondering if Edward could leave the room so we could talk.

"Don't leave," I whispered to him. He looked down and back at Jacob. He was glad that I didn't want him to go anywhere. If Jacob wanted to talk he could talk with Edward here by my side.


	3. Chapter 3: True Love

Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

"What do you want Jacob?" I said angrily.

"Bella, I just…" he hesitated. His eyes flickered to Edward and back to me. "Bl—Edward, could you leave or at least move so Bella and I can talk?" Edward paused. I was also unsure. What if Jacob lost control again? As I thought about this, Edward started to move across the room. His eyes were holding mine and from what I could tell he was sure that if Jacob was going to lose control, he would be there to protect me.

"Okay, Jake, he moved. Now, what do you want to talk to me about?" What was there left to say? Besides, he had already attacked me and broken some bones. What more could he want?

"Bella, I am so, so sorry. I never meant to hurt you. Losing control like that was inexcusable," he said. His eyes were getting angrier. "When you said two weeks, I couldn't help myself. You should have told me earlier so I would have time to prepare! Bella, what were you thinking? Falling for this _leech_ is one thing, but turning _into_ one is unnecessary. You don't have to stoop to that level!" He was shouting at me now. Edward's eyes were getting worried as he inched towards me. My ribs throbbed as my calm breathing turned into panting.

"I love you, Bella and you know that. You don't have to turn into a bloodsucker for me. Staying human is what is best for you, why can't you see that!?" He was quivering again. His eyes bulged and he shivered as the heat swirled down his back.

So quickly I don't even know how it happened, Jacob was kissing me violently, lips boiling and urgent against mine. I hated it for a brief second and then it was over. A yelp and a hiss were the only sounds that I could hear. My heart raced as I saw that Edward had punched Jacob in the jaw and although I wanted to help him, I just couldn't. Steam was rushing out of my mouth as I screamed profanities at him. Edward was by my side in a flash.

"Bella, are you alright?" At that second Emmett came into the room and saw Jacob sprawled on the floor.

"Nice going, Bella." He laughed and I had to laugh too.

"Yeah, right Emmett, like I could take down a werewolf!" Edward glared at Emmett. Emmett left the room roaring with laughter.

"Bella, are you alright?" he repeated since I had not answered it before.

"I'm fine." I took a deep breath which I wished I wouldn't have done as my ribs ached. "Edward, is Jacob ok?" I asked looking over at the whimpering Jacob.

"He is completely fine. He is healing as we speak. I wouldn't be worried if I were you." He said calmly. "Plus, I did warn you didn't I, mongrel?" he asked mockingly.

I smiled at Edward. He was my personal warrior. I knew Jake was a fast healer as Edward assured me, he would be alright. Edward would always be in control and never slip. Hurting me would put his world upside down. He wanted me and most of all he _needed _me. I knew that I could never choose Jacob over Edward EVER. We would be together for eternity, loving each other until the world ended.


	4. Chapter 4: Leaving

Chapter 4

**Chapter 4**

The next few days seemed easy enough. Jacob was done healing after a few hours and I was too angry to face him yet, to tell him that what he did was uncalled-for and totally unnecessary. Edward was not pleased with himself; in fact, he thought that Jacob's outburst was his fault. Everyday he would apologize for his mistake, even though I was the one who caused this.

"Ten-thirty Bella, you have school tomorrow," Charlie reminded me when Edward knocked on the door. I was very proud of Charlie. Being an overprotective father and all, he was talking politely to Edward again, which made Edward and I very happy.

I skipped to the door quickly to see his face. He went hunting today and I haven't hugged, spoken to, kissed or even touched his icy skin for about twelve hours. I yanked the door open and gasped.

It wasn't Edward, it was Alice. She stood there, tiny and fragile looking as always. Her face worried me though. It was sad and sulky and her eyes looked afraid, an emotion I've never seen on any of the Cullen's faces.

"Alice? What are you doing here? Where is Edward?" I asked panicked. "Is everything alright?"

"Bella, can I come in? This is important," she whispered. "Edward will be here in a few minutes." I became relieved that Edward wasn't hurt. Taking a deep breath, I moved aside so Alice could slide into the house.

"Alice! It is really great to see you. What brings you here?" Charlie asked excited as usual when he saw Alice.

"Charlie, we have to talk. I was thinking since graduation is almost here and finals are over, Bella could…" She hesitated. "Perhaps move out, with me of course. It would be more of a road trip for a few years, an adventure."

Charlie looked at me and back to Alice. He smiled tightly, not the kind of nice smile that says he might say yes, more like the kind of smile that appears on someone's face before they explode into anger. As for me, I felt as though my head was swimming in the sea, nausea kicking into gear.

"Alice, don't you live with…with…Edward? I'm sorry but, I am not having my daughter stay with that imbecile!" I flinched, and I thought Charlie was doing well.

"Charlie, listen. Bella and I are going to move…away. Edward will be coming along too, but not living in the same place," she explained thoroughly. Her eyes flickered to my face and winked.

"Bella, do you want to leave?" he asked cautiously. Why was Alice doing this?

"Er, yeah dad. Alice and I have been talking about it for some time now but, only if it's okay with you," I said quickly.

"You are eighteen and I guess this would be alright but, Bella, I do have a few conditions." He said. I was glad he had agreed but, very curious to why Alice was doing this.

"Okay, dad, whatever you want," I said reassuringly.

"First, you have to wait here for about a week. Next, you have to visit as often as you can and thirdly, call me every night just to check in. Making sure you're safe is my number one priority, alright kid?" He laughed. This must be a happy time for him. I was glad he was letting me go, almost certainly because he had seen it coming for awhile.

"That sounds very…reasonable."

"Charlie, can Bella and I go to my home and discuss this? We need to plan everything!"

"Wait, I forgot to ask, where are you two planning to go?" he wondered.

"We are going to travel actually. Place to place, like I said, I road trip. We would go to one state for a week and then another, maybe a few different countries. Don't worry about it. I will keep Bella very, very safe," Alice said calmly. Her plan to take me away must have been very thought out.

"Alright, you two, go have fun! Stay as long as you like, just not too long." Charlie liked the idea of Alice and me together. She was his angel in his eyes.

We walked out the door and I was nervous for what kind of trouble I was in now. Seeing the silver Volvo, pulled my spirits higher, for I saw Edward sitting in the front seat. I climbed in the car and Edward got out of the drivers seat and came to sit by me in the back seat. He pulled me onto his lap and kissed me. After I started to get faint he pulled away and wrapped his arm around my waist.

Now, I waited to hear who or what was trying to assassinate me now.


	5. Chapter 5: My Family

Chapter 5

**Chapter 5**

As they looked at me, my stomach turned and rolled inside of my body and before long it was in a giant knot. I knew that whatever the problem was, we would have to leave, and leave soon.

"Edward? What is going on here?" I asked uneasily.

"Bella, love, we are going to have to leave Forks for awhile. It's not safe here anymore." At that moment Alice was driving at an unimaginable speed. I shook my head feeling the tears fill up my eyes. Why was this happening…again?

"Don't cry, we are going to be just fine," He said. "It is okay. Alice and I have plans to get you out of here and you will be completely safe with us. I promise you."

"Why are we leaving, for the last time? Tell me right now!" I shouted.

Edward wiped the tears that spilled over with his icy fingertips.

"Well…Jacob was pretty miffed with you after I broke his face. Somehow, he got some sort of contact with the Volturi. That brainless mongrel told Aro that we were not planning to change you. He thinks messing with the Volturi isn't dangerous and that they will only want to _talk_ with us." My brain froze and I couldn't see anything. The car seemed to be sinking. It was happening to me, ordinary, normal, plain Bella, running away from some mythical creatures.

We must have gotten to the house because Alice was opening the door for me and picking me up. Edward climbed out of the car and held my hand as we walked to the house. As we stepped inside, I saw every part of my future family, Jasper, Rosalie, Emmett, Esme and Carlisle. None of their faces looked worried in the least. Edward squeezed my hand and led me over to the white couch. I sat down and looked at all of their beautiful faces. All of their piercing eyes were looking at my traumatized face as well.

"Edward," Carlisle broke the awkward silence first. "What is your plan?"

"Like I said a few months ago, Demitri relies on his tracking expertise. Since Bella is immune to his powers, he won't be able to find her. He will be completely clueless. All we need to do is move, move and the Volturi won't have any idea where to find her." He smiled widely. Confidence spread in his topaz eyes.

"Am I still going to become a vampire?" I blurted out. What was I thinking? This was definitely not time or the place to be asking this.

Edward hesitated. "Yes, and soon I believe. If we can get the Volturi confused for long enough time, we can change you, and then come back to Forks. They will see you are a vampire and let us off the hook."

It seemed like a great idea to me. I would become a vampire…and soon. My heart fluttered rapidly. Edward heard the change in my steady heart bet and smiled a crookedly.

"It sounds like a plan," Emmett said. He stood up and for the first time, gave me a big bear hug. "Welcome to the family," he whispered.

"Welcome to the family" repeated in my head. I smiled content.


	6. Chapter 6: Time

Chapter 6

**Chapter 6**

The next few days were extremely nerve wrecking. School was harder than ever and on top of that, Charlie was sulking around the house, sad because his little girl was finally a woman. I loved that Edward was calm, and it made me calm in a way too but, when Edward was not there to protect me from my thoughts, I was worrying about the Volturi coming to kill me, or at least try.

Tuesday's nightmares were horrific. I dreamt that the Volturi came to Forks, but the one vampire I noticed the most was Jane. As Edward tried to protect me she tortured him with her deadly thoughts. He fell to the ground in pain. She didn't know—or maybe she did—but she was torturing me more than she was hurting Edward. When she was done with her disgusting game she looked over at me and smirked. I waited for the pain, the torture, the aching I would feel within seconds; when the pain started, I awoke with a piercing scream.

"Bella! What happened? Are you alright?" He didn't care about Charlie waking to find him in my room. Edward was thinking of me, which made me calm down.

"Nothing, no I'm fine. Just a bad dream, that's all." I lowered my head onto Edward's cold chest and breathed in the smell coming off of him. It comforted my worries as I drifted to sleep once more.

I awoke to a cold hand on my forehead and I smiled. Excited as usual, I opened my eyes to find _his_ face. Once I spotted it, my heart flew and had an irregular beat as always.

"Good morning, love," Edward said sweetly.

"Good morning," I replied.

Suddenly, his face became uneasy. He looked into my eyes with sadness. My stomach turned when I saw that look on his face.

"Bella, it is time. It's time to tell Charlie. He won't take it well, but I am sure you can handle it." Oh. He was poignant because he knew I would be sad. How did I not see that coming? Although he was right, I could see myself telling Charlie that I would be moving out. I was confident that I would be able to do this.

"Is Charlie still here?" I whispered.

"Yes. It's Saturday, he has the day off like usual, remember?" He laughed. I forced out a shaky, nervous laugh which made Edward laugh even louder, but not loud enough to send Charlie sprinting up the stairs with a shotgun.

"I know this may seem difficult to you, but he will love you no matter what. He has been expecting you to leave pretty soon here and plus, he has been think of you with me." He smiled.

I took a deep breath in and exhaled out a few times before I stood up. Edward took my face in his hands and kissed me.

"I will meet you down there in 10 minutes," he said after I was gasping for air.

As I walked down the stairs that seemed way longer than they were supposed to be, I wondered what I would say _exactly_ to Charlie. Overreacting was his most excellent talent. When I got downstairs, I saw Charlie sitting on the couch watching the game that was on two nights ago. He never seemed to get bored with the same show four times in a row. I went to go sit by him.

"Hey, dad," I said apprehensively.

"Morning, Bella. How was your sleep?" he asked with his eyes still glued to the television.

"Er…I have to talk to you about something, Edward too. We need to discuss an important matter." My voice was an octave higher than usual and I sounded almost as formal as one of the Cullens.

"Okay Bells, what would you like to discuss?"

I heard the knock at the door and walked slowly to it. Taking a deep breath, I opened it and took Edward's hand.

There was no backing out now.


	7. Chapter 7:New Beginning

Chapter 7

**Chapter 7**

"Hello, Charlie," Edward said as we walked into the room.

"Edward," Charlie said grumpily. I guess when I said both Edward and I needed to talk with him, he thought I would be speaking on Edward's behalf.

Charlie stayed on the chair as Edward and I sat on the couch to face him.

"Dad, Edward and I have been talking. We both agree that I am old enough to move out," I began to breath harder. This would be a little more difficult than I thought it would be. I began again.

"Bella, I thought that we already agreed that you were moving out with Alice."

"Yes, but we will be traveling a lot. I may not be able to visit as much as you want me to," Saying this was bringing tears to my eyes. Edward squeezed my hand.

"Actually, Charlie, Bella and I were discussing marriage as well. She has said yes. So we are officially engaged." Dear Lord, what was he thinking? Did he want me to die? This wasn't apart of our discussed plan! My regular breathing became hyperventilating and my head started to swirl as the living room walls spun.

"WHAT? Bella, what is he talking about? Are you really thinking about marrying this…this _monster_?" He screamed.

"Charlie, she is old enough too get married and move in with me. She can take care of herself." Edward explained.

"You think that I don't know this? I know how old my own daughter is. I know that she can take care of herself but, her getting married to an idiot like you would completely ruin her plans for _college_." Charlie yelled.

I could feel the shock and confusion on my face. Feeling the anger that radiated off of my skin was making my eyes produce so many tears that I couldn't see anything. Everything was a blur.

"Charlie, she _will_ be going to college. I will make sure of that, I promise," Edward said. He was being much calmer than Charlie was.

"So, you and Bella will be at the same college, married?" Charlie asked, a little more composed than before.

"Yes, that is the plan. Charlie, I would never hurt Bella. I would take care of her forever. Letting her down in any way would pull me down with her."

"Bella, what are your opinions on this?" Charlie asked. He sounded like he was in a business meeting.

I looked up, confused. What were my opinions on marriage and my "college" education?

"I…I want to be with Edward forever, dad. He makes me happy and I think I do the same for him." I looked up and smiled at Edward, forgetting that I was mad at him. "He will take care of me. We will go to the same college together and it will be fine. Trust me on this, it will work."

Charlie took a deep breath.

"Okay, I trust you." He smiled weakly. "You are old enough to make your own decisions and I need to accept that." I smiled too.

This was the start of a brand new beginning.


	8. Chapter 8: Adventure

Chapter 8

**Chapter 8**

A few days after we talked to Charlie, I realized exactly what was going on. I would be leaving Forks forever. As Edward and I were driving, I broke into sobs and cried harder than when Edward left me. I shook my head to get the horrifying thought out of my brain.

"I…I am just worried…about the Volturi…finding me." I said in between sobs. "What if they find me? They will kill you. Alice! They will kill Alice for promising and then breaking it! What are we going to do?" I wiped the tears with the back of my hand.

"Bella, do you think I would let _anything_ happen to you or Alice? I wouldn't let anything happen to anyone that I love. If the Volturi come to Forks, they won't get to you or anyone of us. I promise. Besides, we are leaving pretty soon. All you have to do is pack your things and we have to get some solitude." His voice was so influential. He made me forget that I was worried and it made me tranquil.

We pulled up to the Cullen house to pack Edward's possessions as well as Alice's. Alice greeted us at the door and Edward pulled me upstairs to his room. As we walked he grasped my waist and pulled me closer to him.

"Everything will be alright. Trust me on this, please," he whispered in my ear. His icy breath tickled and the fragrance of him made me dizzy.

We opened the door to his room and he motioned for me to sit on the bed while he quickly packed all of his necessities, not that he needed more than one box. He would probably buy more things when we got to our new destination. All of the rest of his belongings would stay at the house for our rare visits to Forks. I watched Edward while he got al of his things together. All I could do was relax and watch; he would be done packing within a few minutes. There was absolutely no need to help. Alice came in with her small pink bag. I guessed it probably had hair supplies and an endless quantity of makeup items. She would most likely use some of those items on me.

"Ready to go?" Alice asked politely.

"Yes, we need to get Bella's things and then we leave." Edward kissed my hair. "We will be back before you know it. A few weeks will seem like a few days, you'll see." He whispered to me.

"Yeah, Bella, don't worry about anything. We all have it under control, just like always," Alice said with confidence.

Once Edward was finally packed, all three of us walked downstairs. I was expecting to see the rest of the Cullens saying farewell to us, but none were to be seen.

"Where is everyone?" I asked curiously.

"They all went hunting. None of them have been hunting in so long," Alice explained.

"We will call them when we get the chance, but now we must go," Edward said impatiently.

We all got into the Volvo and drove at an immense speed down the swirled road. I looked out the window as I thought about where we would go. Asking would be inappropriate at this time.

I must have been thinking about something interesting because we were unexpectedly driving down my lonely street. As we pulled into Charlie's driveway, I saw Charlie slowly get up from the kitchen table. He must have tried to cook for himself tonight. Edward came around to open the car door for me. He hugged me and led me into the house.

"Hey, Bells," Charlie said as both of us walked into the kitchen. "Do you need any help packing your stuff?" He asked.

"No, dad, I'm fine. Thanks for asking." I was almost in tears. This was almost as bad as the time I had to tell Charlie I was moving back to Phoenix when James was planning to slaughter me, except this time I wasn't lying.

I walked upstairs to my room and grabbed by bag. Edward grabbed all of shirts and put them neatly into the bag. I grabbed my toiletry bag and put it into the larger one. By the time we were done, it had only been a few minutes at the most.

I strode down the stairs that seemed a few miles rather than a few yards. As I was about to say goodbye to Charlie Edward grabbed my bag and headed outside so I wouldn't feel pressured to hurry.

"Goodbye, kid." Charlie said weakly. His face was sad.

"Bye, Dad. I will call every week, I promise you," I said happily…or at least I tried to sound that way.

We hugged silently and I started to tear up. I pulled away and ran out the door before I started to sob. Edward was waiting by the door and he pulled me into his arms. I knew what I was doing to Charlie was heartbreaking and unforgivable but, I had to do it. Edward carried me to the car and pulled me onto his lap.

Off we went to a place…what place? I had no clue.


End file.
